"Wake me up, when September ends..." - Fresher's Week Fanatics/Fears
03:43
Across the country, thousands of 18 year
olds are being risen/rudely awakened from their post-exam, I’ve worked myself
to the ground, now I’m going to spend the summer sleeping/embracing my carefree
“I have no ties in the world” attitude at festivals bliss. It is a terrifying time.
It is an exciting time. It is, indeed, time for The Next Chapter (cue Star Wars
theme tune). September is in full swing, and university Fresher’s Weeks have
commenced. Whether you’re yet to fly the nest, sat amongst suitcases and boxes
and wondering where you’re going to find room for the kitchen sink, or, if
you’re in a blurry, “I have no idea where I am, who I am, or what I am doing
here” haze, then here’s the thing that no-one truly believes until they’ve come
out the other side of Fresher’s Week: You are not alone!
Fresher’s Week brings the biggest truckful
of luggage you will ever see; it’s something grandparents and aunts, uncles and
friends, older siblings and your neighbour’s dentist’s sister’s postman has
contributed to: expectations and should bes/dos. Everyone has something to say
on what, I’m sure you’ve heard by now, but just in case you’ve missed the memo,
will be The Best Week of Your Life. Now, when I left for Exeter 3 years ago, I
quite literally took my worldly belongings with me and yes, my packing was arguably a tad excessive, but
such is life! Jumpers, course books and food supplies aside (I swear my mum
thought she was sending me into unchartered territory), the biggest box, as it
was for me, will be that of anticipation and expectation. After all, everyoneeee
has told you that Fresher’s will be The Best Week of Your Life. And everyoneeee
cannot be wrong/lying/exaggerating…can they?
Well, yes, maybe, ish, an ickle bit…Here’s
the thing that our well-meaning well-wishers tend to forget to mention:
Fresher’s Week is NOT an accurate portrayal of uni!! Some of you may well love
Fresher’s Week, others will spend it sobbing and questioning what the heck
you’ve done and convinced you’ve made the most catastrophic move of your life.
All I will say, regardless of how you “truly feel”, is TRY IT. Stick it out. It
won’t last forever. Your course WILL start soon. And, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but, umm, you're going to have a fair bit of work to be doing! Keep busy, do as much as you
possibly can – yes, you’ll meet people, try new things, but perhaps more importantly, you’ll
have less time to think and thinking is NOT what you need to be doing right
now! Try to be okay – as tough as that is. Get through this and you can get
through the next 3 years easily! There are people who will listen – use them.
You might be lonely, but you are not alone.
Fresher’s Week may well be The Best Week of Your Life, who am I to say it won’t be?! But, what people too often forget to
say is that it doesn’t HAVE to be the best week of your life! You’ve got a lot
still to come – balls and parties, lectures and seminars, Christmassy things
and summer beach trips – you can’t cram it all into one week now! You’re thrown
in at the deep end, quite literally, and, well, it takes time to learn where
the currents are, who you want to swim with and who, in as nice a way as
possible, you’re kind of just caught in the net with…
Fresher’s Week for me was a whirlwind and
when I look back I remember being massively overwhelmed, yet massively underwhelmed,
both at the same time. The pace was fast – there was constantly stuff going on
– I went to ballet, I went climbing, I signed up for surfing and kayaking…and
actually, I don’t really remember being in my room for that much of that first
week. But if you do find yourself with
time on your hands, make your room YOURS. It’s where you’re going to be for the
next 8 months or so and whether that idea fills you with excitement or dread,
you’re going to be sad to leave when the time comes to pack those boxes again.
Posters, photos and bunting were my must-haves. My halls were horrendous (I
mean, the building has now been closed and is having a much-needed
makeover/refurb/demolish). Think bricks walls and wooden ceilings. But, at the end of
those 8 months, my room was My Room. With my paper snowflakes at Christmas, and
pinboard that became plastered with train tickets and memories, C007 will
always have a special place in my heart. For 8 months, much as I resisted it at
first, those 4 walls were “home”.
In hindsight, running back to halls on my
first night in Exeter, crying hysterically and convincing myself I was going
home the next morning, as soon as it was a reasonable hour to ring my parents
with minimal panic, was less than ideal. And yet, in hindsight, waking up,
albeit puffy eyed, the next morning, staying in Exeter, facing the people I’d,
quite literally, ran from, at breakfast, and bringing the biscuit tin, a swivel
chair and my mug to the morning party was possibly the best thing I ever did.
The foam party and the UV party, the essentials shopping trip and the awkward
“hi I’m X, I’m from Y and I’m studying Z” conversations may just be the foundations
of some of the best friendships you ever make…or, they may be the holding hand
you need to get you across the bridge in one piece and see you on your way. And
here’s the great bit: you won’t know any of this until you are much, much
further in! You won’t know any of this until you’ve cleaned up after one
another and cleaned one another up, until you’ve shared marmite, tea bags,
milk, the food supply box your granny sent, until you’ve sat in the laundry room with one another in the
early hours because those machines are like gold dust, until you’ve fished an
iPhone out of the sink, because yes, hand-washing was indeed a terrible idea, until
you’ve tried to catch a spider together….and resorted to moving out of your
room for the night. No-one is expecting you to know. And that’s not “being
fake”, quite the opposite, that’s being real. I like to think I was myself
during Fresher’s Week and the entirety of my time at uni, and I think I can
honestly say I was. I like to think I was kind and caring, even when I was
feeling horrendous myself. I like to think that even if I may not really speak
much to the friends I made in those first few weeks, we will remain just that:
friends.
And if you’re returning to uni, look out
for those fresher friends: a smile goes a long way. For what it’s worth, I enjoyed Fresher’s Week
Take 2 and Take 3 considerably more. I partied less. I knew the score – I knew
where to go and what to do (true freshers, you’ll find you spend A LOT of time
wandering around/getting to places – this time is not wasted, enjoy the
ride!). Takes 2 and 3, I knew I was truly “home” and
safely reunited with my "uni family". Fresher’s Take 2 was the year of the sandy
shoes when a beach party left me slightly worse for wear, but very, very happy.
Fresher’s Take 3 was the year of GBBO Wednesdays, and sympathetic Fresher’s Flu
(this does exist so dose up on your Vit C!!) hit me like a tonne of bricks
before the week was halfway through – a sure sign I’m too old for this game!!!
Fresher’s Week, in all its glory: enjoy it,
but don’t use it as the marker. Glitter wears off over time, sand finds its way
back to the sea (or atlas out of your shoes), UV paint does fade – even if it appears you will be stained fluorescent
for the rest of your days. Be brave. Bravery can and WILL take you a long way.
Change is always scary, but change doesn’t stay change forever.
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